when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
His hands were made for my vagina.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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