Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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