Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Randomize
