YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
