the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize