just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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