So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
