Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
