things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
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