Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
did you just send me my own nude
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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