Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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