If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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