remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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