Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize