with your own penis?
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
