I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
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