yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
you win again, gameday.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Randomize
