I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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