are you still at the devil's house?
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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