yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
