bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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