I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
