we have officially lost it.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
