hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
