Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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