If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
