I just made out with a guy for $7.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Randomize
