people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
