Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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