There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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