Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
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