Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
