dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
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