drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
