I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
