The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
