With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
