she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
