its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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