I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
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