we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
