At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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