My hair reeks of homosexuality.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
