I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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