Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
