Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
