apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Mom said you looked used
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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