Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
