Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
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