i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
The best revenge is premature balding
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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